Saturday Date Night

Free time is a luxury. Between work and the kids I don’t have much. I try to use the few moments I have to get some writing done. I work on the relationships on my page. I stress over them and wonder how I can get them to their happily ever after.

But recently, I realized how long it had been since my husband and I had worked on our relationship. For that matter, I couldn’t remember the last time we spent any time together. Sure, we saw each other every night (or rather most nights as he travels a lot for work). We caught glimpses of each other while we cleaned up after dinner, gave the kids their baths, put them in their beds and everything else in between. Even after that, he’ll want to watch the hockey game while I want to write and watch the Big Bang Theory so off we went on our separate ways. Him in the living room as I settled into our bedroom to get an hour so of quiet time in before the baby woke up.

I’m tired just typing this up. It’s my life everyday and I’m sure there’s a lot of you out there who feel the same way.

We’ve been married for the past seven years and had our first child five years ago. Between work and life, we let our connection falter a little. The good thing is I know that we’re meant to be together, as annoying as we find each other sometimes. So, in order to get things back on track I’ve reinstated a once a month required Saturday Date Night. Now I know this sounds super scheduled and restrictive…well it is and too bad. We needed it! We needed to force ourself to give each other some time together, just us two in a nice restaurant with nice cutlery and alcohol.

Our first scheduled date was last week and I’ll be honest, it almost didn’t happen! Once again we were about to let life get in the way, but we pushed through, drove the kids to Grandma’s house and headed our for our 6:30pm reservation. YES, I said 6:30pm and I’m not ashamed (although the restaurant was pretty empty when we arrived!) This gave us plenty of time to relax before we had to pick up the kids at around 9:00pm.

Guys. This is the best thing we’ve done in years. We didn’t talk about anything important. Nothing about money, bills, daycare, work. I can’t even tell you what we talked about because for the most part we were just joking around, and most importantly eating. Oh it was SO good. I forgot what it was like to go to a nice restaurant.

And it was exactly what we needed. Some time together without outside stresses. Enjoying each others company instead of struggling to get through the chores of the day.

It’s so easy to forget how much work a relationship is, and not just in a couple. Siblings, parents, friends, coworkers, neighbours, the list goes on and on.

What do you do to keep  your relationships on track? Girls night with your best friend?  An after work cocktail with coworkers? With everything we all have going on, how do you find the time to fit everyone into your busy schedule?

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6 thoughts on “Saturday Date Night

  1. I can’t stress how important it is to find time for each other – we’ve been married for 25 years and we had those difficult years when the kids were small. Planning is important, and you’re on the right track. One of the things we do now sounds a bit silly, but we spend time together with about two TV programs which we both enjoy. One of them is our guilty pleasure (get ready to cringe), American Idol. But we both met in the music business and have a lot to say about the contestants. My husband didn’t use to watch AI but now he does with me, and it’s amazing how much just sharing a simple interest like this can help connections. Of course I’d prefer going out to eat, but for now this is what we do!

  2. I love your post and totally agree. It is easy, especially when your children are little to forget to take the time for each other, but to have a good relationship you must. Food looks amazing!

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