Free time is a luxury. Between work and the kids I don’t have much. I try to use the few moments I have to get some writing done. I work on the relationships on my page. I stress over them and wonder how I can get them to their happily ever after.
But recently, I realized how long it had been since my husband and I had worked on our relationship. For that matter, I couldn’t remember the last time we spent any time together. Sure, we saw each other every night (or rather most nights as he travels a lot for work). We caught glimpses of each other while we cleaned up after dinner, gave the kids their baths, put them in their beds and everything else in between. Even after that, he’ll want to watch the hockey game while I want to write and watch the Big Bang Theory so off we went on our separate ways. Him in the living room as I settled into our bedroom to get an hour so of quiet time in before the baby woke up.
I’m tired just typing this up. It’s my life everyday and I’m sure there’s a lot of you out there who feel the same way.
We’ve been married for the past seven years and had our first child five years ago. Between work and life, we let our connection falter a little. The good thing is I know that we’re meant to be together, as annoying as we find each other sometimes. So, in order to get things back on track I’ve reinstated a once a month required Saturday Date Night. Now I know this sounds super scheduled and restrictive…well it is and too bad. We needed it! We needed to force ourself to give each other some time together, just us two in a nice restaurant with nice cutlery and alcohol.
Our first scheduled date was last week and I’ll be honest, it almost didn’t happen! Once again we were about to let life get in the way, but we pushed through, drove the kids to Grandma’s house and headed our for our 6:30pm reservation. YES, I said 6:30pm and I’m not ashamed (although the restaurant was pretty empty when we arrived!) This gave us plenty of time to relax before we had to pick up the kids at around 9:00pm.
Guys. This is the best thing we’ve done in years. We didn’t talk about anything important. Nothing about money, bills, daycare, work. I can’t even tell you what we talked about because for the most part we were just joking around, and most importantly eating. Oh it was SO good. I forgot what it was like to go to a nice restaurant.
And it was exactly what we needed. Some time together without outside stresses. Enjoying each others company instead of struggling to get through the chores of the day.
It’s so easy to forget how much work a relationship is, and not just in a couple. Siblings, parents, friends, coworkers, neighbours, the list goes on and on.
What do you do to keep your relationships on track? Girls night with your best friend? An after work cocktail with coworkers? With everything we all have going on, how do you find the time to fit everyone into your busy schedule?